Purpose. There are many ways you can tell that you may
relapse—that is, start using drugs or alcohol again.
This section will help you examine thoughts, feelings, and behaviors
you have before you relapse.
Instructions. Read the following lists of relapse
warning
signs. Place a check mark next to any that have happened to you.
Place a question mark next to any that you do not understand.
Underline any words that cause you to have strong thoughts or
feelings, or make you want to do something.
Phase I: Internal Warning Signs
___
1.
Trouble thinking clearly:
Sometimes I cannot understand what is going on. At times, it is hard to
think, or I can only think about the same thing over and over. At times
I cannot think at all, or when I do, I make mistakes that I usually
would not make
.___
2.
Trouble managing feelings
and emotions:
Sometimes I have mood swings. I go from feeling excited to feeling
depressed within a matter of minutes. Sometimes I do not feel anything
when I know I should. At times the way I feel does not match up with
anything that is happening. At times I feel or act crazy and feel bad
later. When these things happen, I try to forget about them.
___
3.
Trouble remembering things:
At times, I forget things I have just learned. Sometimes I can remember
things from the past and other times I can't, no matter how hard I try.
Sometimes when I can't remember, I make mistakes that I feel bad about
later.
___
4.
Trouble managing stress:
Sometimes I do not know when I am tense until I become really uptight.
When I try to relax, it gets worse. Sometimes it gets so bad that I am
afraid I might collapse or go crazy.
___
5.
Trouble sleeping:
At times, I cannot sleep at night. When I do, I still feel tired the
next day. Sometimes I have strange dreams and nightmares, including
dreams about using that seem real. Sometimes I get very tired and sleep
much longer than usual.
___
6.
Trouble with physical
coordination: Sometimes I stagger, have dizzy spells, stumble, or
have accidents. At times reading and writing become more difficult.
___
7.
Feelings of shame, guilt,
and hopelessness:
At times I feel guilty and ashamed. I think something is wrong with me
and I am afraid I won't get better. When these things happen, I try to
take care of them on my own. I do not tell anyone. No matter how hard I
try, things seem to get worse and I begin to think it is hopeless to
try.
Phase II: Return of Denial
___
8.
Concern about well-being:
Sometimes I worry about my recovery. This worry comes and goes and
doesn't seem to last very long.
___
9.
Denial of the concern:
In order to deal with these worries, I try not to think about them.
Soon I forget what I was worried about. Sometimes even when I try to
remember, I can't.
Phase III: Avoidance and Defensive Behavior
___
10.
Believing "I'll never use
again":
Sometimes I believe I will never use alcohol or drugs again. Sometimes
I tell others, but most of the time I keep this to myself. When I start
believing this, I do not feel I have to work as hard to stay clean and
sober.
___
11.
Thinking about others
instead of myself:
When I stop working as hard to stay sober and clean, I find myself
blaming other people for my problems. Sometimes I think others should
be acting differently, and I criticize them to others or to myself.
___
12.
Defensiveness:
When I start thinking this way, I feel as if others do not like what I
am doing. I get angry when people try to talk to me and I avoid them. I
do not let other people talk, or I do not talk so they won't find out
how I feel.
___
13.
Compulsive behaviors:
I overdo things and get wrapped up in things so I do not have time to
think. I may get overinvolved with work, sex, food, exercise, or AA,
just so I do not have to think about or feel my problems. This doesn't
make my problems go away.
___
14.
Impulsive behavior: I
become so stressed out that I do things on the spur of the moment that
I feel bad about later.
___
15.
Tendencies toward loneliness:
Even though I want to be around people, I make excuses so that I do not
have to. I spend more time alone, and do things to avoid thinking and
feeling.
Phase IV: Crisis Building
___
16.
Tunnel vision:
I look only at a small part of my life, and ignore everything else.
When little things go wrong, I blow up and feel like life is unfair.
___
17.
Minor depression:
I start to feel down and depressed. I have less and less energy, and I
oversleep. I try not to feel these things by getting busy and not
talking about it, but the feelings do not go away.
___
18.
Loss of constructive
planning: I stop making plans for my day and react to whatever
comes up.
___
19.
Plans begin to fail:
My plans are not well thought out or realistic. I begin to have more
and more problems. I feel bad about them, but do not know how to solve
them.
Phase V: Immobilization
___
20.
Daydreaming and wishful
thinking: I daydream about something that might solve all my
problems like winning the lottery or running away to another place.
___
21.
Feeling that nothing can be
solved: I begin to feel as if I have failed at recovery. Nothing I
do appears to make things better.
___
22.
Unfulfilled wish to be happy:
I want things to work out and I want to be happy, but I don't know how
to make them better or I'm afraid to try.
Phase VI: Confusion and Overreaction
___
23.
Periods of confusion: I
can't figure anything out. This makes me angry with myself and I become
more confused.
___
24.
Easily angered:
I become angry with people over little things. I feel angry most of the
time and am afraid I might hurt someone. Sometimes I want to hurt
others.
___
25.
Irritation with friends:
When other people try to talk to me about what is going on, I think
they are criticizing me and we have arguments.
Phase VII: Depression
____
26.
Irregular eating habits:
I stop eating regular meals, and eat junk food instead. I either
overeat or eat little or nothing.
___
27.
Lack of desire to take
action: I feel scared and trapped. It seems impossible to start,
let alone finish anything.
___
28.
Irregular sleeping habits:
I find it impossible to sleep until I am completely exhausted. When I
finally get to sleep, I have bad dreams and may sleep for 12 to 20
hours at a time.
___
29.
Loss of daily structure:
I get so stressed and miserable that I cannot make decisions. I miss
appointments and meetings. Sometimes I plan on going, but I am running
so late that I decide not to go at all.
___
30.
Periods of deep depression:
I feel hungry, angry, lonely, and tired. I feel angry with others. They
try to help, but I think that nobody really cares.
Phase VIII: Behavioral Loss of Control
___
31.
Irregular attendance at
AA/NA and treatment meetings:
I stop going to my regular AA or NA meetings. I miss counseling
appointments. I begin to feel that there are more important things to
do and that the sessions aren't helping anyway.
___
32.
Development of an "I don't
care" attitude: I feel like everything is hopeless. I don't want
other people to know this, so I act as if I don't care.
___
33.
Open rejection of help:
When people try to help me, I blow up and drive them away. I tell
others that I do not need their help and avoid anyone who might see how
I really feel.
___
34.
Feelings of powerlessness
and helplessness: Things appear to be so bad that it seems useless
to try to do anything to make them better.
Phase IX: Recognition of Loss of Control
___
35.
Self-pity: I feel sorry
for myself and try to get sympathy and attention from friends or AA/NA
and family members.
___
36.
Thoughts of social drinking:
I start thinking that maybe I could drink or use drugs and stay in
control. I think about how good it would feel to drink or use drugs for
just a little while.
___
37.
Conscious lying: I
start to lie to others even when I do not need to.
___
38.
Complete loss of
selfconfidence:
I think I am a total failure at recovery and in life. I do not believe
that I can change things for the better, no matter what I do.
Phase X: Option Reduction
___
39.
Deep resentments: I
feel angry with the world and feel as if everyone is against me.
___
40.
Discontinue all treatment
and AA/NA: I do not attend AA/NA meetings, avoid my sponsor, and
have stopped going to counseling or aftercare.
___
41.
Overwhelming loneliness,
frustration, anger, and tension: I begin to feel like I am insane
and think my only choices are drinking or using drugs, suicide, or
insanity.
___
42.
Loss of behavioral control:
I have problems in all areas of my life. I cannot control how I act,
think, or feel.
Phase XI: Return to Use, or Physical/Emotional Collapse
___
43.
Return to "controlled" use:
I try to use with control and sometimes I am able to do this for a
short period.
___
44.
Shame and guilt:
I feel ashamed and guilty for using and believe that if I had done
things the right way, this wouldn't have happened to me. I believe I am
a bad person because I've started to use again.
___
45.
Loss of control: I
begin to use just as much or more than I did before.
___
46.
Life problems:
I begin to have severe problems with my spouse/partner, job, friends,
health, or the law. I need professional help in order to get better.
(This checklist was taken from the Counselor's
Manual for Relapse Prevention With Chemically
Dependent Criminal Offenders.)